Swing Life Awayyy

tylerfucklin:

can you imagine if someone sent you a list of all the reasons why they love you.

why would i want blank paper

(Source: l0stkeys, via la-douleur-exquisite)

itsbetterthananal:

itsbetterthananal:

my dad just yelled up the stairs “CHLOE DID YOU KNOW THE WEATHERMAN WAS GAY I DIDNT KNOW HE WAS GAY HE JUST GOT MARRIED TO HIS BOYFRIEND” and i was like which weatheman are we talking about here and he said “THE BLONDE ONE WITH THE SHARP HAIR CUT AND THE TIGHT PECS AND THE HOT ASS BODY” dad is there something you want to tell me

why does this have nearly 100,000 notes

(via la-douleur-exquisite)

wtf what do 3/4 of my followers do because they sure don’t reblog or like my posts

seriously what do you guys do

are you waiting for something

what are you waiting for

(Source: android18, via pirateswhodontdoanything)

emilioestevez:

story time

so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.

(via pirateswhodontdoanything)

natured:

I was standing in line at dairy queen and I saw an elderly lady crying because she didn’t have enough money to pay for her small blizzard, so I bought her a large and helped her out to her car, and she cried and said ” I hope God made someone just for you out in the world so that they can treat you as special as you are” and I am sobbing right now.

(via pirateswhodontdoanything)

gnarly-gnat:

one time at a wax museum i thought one of the tour guides was a wax person cuz they were just standing there not moving so i go up to them like “who the fuck is this supposed to be” then they just looked at me and laughed

(via la-douleur-exquisite)

oh-woah-dope:

since this is yahoo, can someone help me please?

i held a girl’s hand the other day and she didn’t come to school for like a week. did i made her pregnant?

(via bltsl4)

tardisity:

The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.

(via ramsaymacdonald)